I had to tell the Tank (from across the room) to quit trying to do kung-fu punches to the sweet little girl sitting next to him on the stand. This was done with sign language and darts flying from my eyes. It worked.
I had to tell Tiny-T to listen to her teacher and SIT DOWN. She kept climbing up on her front row seat and staring at the kiddos filling the rows behind her. Her poor teacher (Sunbeams has ONE student, Tiny-T) kept trying to pull her around and sit her down and T kept saying no and turning any way. Until T looked my way and I mouthed... SIT DOWN, while making a down motion with my hand. It worked.
Then there was Fan-C. She wouldn't stop talking. Chatting with the girls sitting next to her and then her teacher. Her teacher kept asking her to quiet down and finally said, you need to be quiet and look at your mom... she is watching you. Fan-C then tells her that she doesn't want me for her mom and wants her teacher to be her mom. She went on to explain why... (I'm not including that here... ) Fan-C would not look over toward us and when she stood to sing she would turn her back on us. I still enjoyed the program. Then the final speaker stood, our bishop and presented his short talk and about half way into it... I broke down and started bawling. I don't mean like tears running down my face stuff... I mean like tears running everywhere, red faced, sobbing... ugly mess. Lance was trying to figure out what was wrong and so I wrote out the exchanged I witnessed.
All of a sudden, being in the front row was my HELL. I couldn't escape without the ward seeing me in an ugly mess. I was sitting by one of the side doors leading to the outdoors and kept asking Lance if it was an emergency door. Would I trigger some kind of alarm going out the door? (I wouldn't have... ) I just sat there, stuck, sobbing and heart broken.
Now, I'm a tough lady. My journey to get my kiddos was tough and I grew thick skin on that journey. For some reason today, Fan-C requesting a new momma just broke me. I think it came down to the reasons she stated to wanting a different mommy... Wow.
Bliss to Hell in one fell swoop...
2 comments:
Stephanie, I don't even know how I got to your blog (just lurking, I guess)but I read this post and just felt so bad for you. I have been there. I've wanted an emergency door but was stuck in the RS Room (where it's even quieter) 3 rows and 6 seats away from the escape door! Not only that, without any Kleenex. Bawling silently with the tears flowing and the (excuse me) snot building and no Kleenex is not pretty. I still remember that particular day with a lot of pain. So, that said, I'm sorry that you had to deal with a similar issue. And I'm really sorry that whatever reason she gave hurt you so much. Kids comments can really cut deep. I'm sure she loves you dearly and doesn't really want a new mommy--but nevertheless, OUCH. I hope you don't mind my random comment. I just wanted you to know that I care.
Stephanie, I too can relate to feeling so hurt by a comment made from my kids. When I had Devin, I was struggling a lot with being tired and trying to juggle new parenthood and still devote time for Ryan. Ryan, in his frustration with my attention being on Devin and not him, had repeated a comment my idiot ex had said. He was trying to get attention, and I knew that’s what it was, but it still stung deep. I know it’s painful, but deep down; your daughter loves you and knows that you are her Mom, no matter what. Stay strong!
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