I need a break.
Like a real vacation that doesn't have me cooking, cleaning and doing laundry everyday ~ just in a new location. I want a REAL veg-out and be waited on vacation.
December ~ lost Lance's father unexpectedly
April 22nd ~ discovered that one of our children has a severe mental disorder. (this has been ongoing since that moment forward)
May ~ We fired our property management company that was tending (bare bones) to our Texas property. Now we are officially LONG-distance landlords. The moment we fired the company our leaser calls with repair needs (big ones $$$$), of course.
May 30th ~ We officially notified that the little mister we have been waiting on for over a year and a half is going to a family placement ~ there are other details but I can't share them. Just know that we wanted him since notified (he was nine days old) and they said NO three times and then decided to take him after all. CRUSHING!
Only an hour and a half later my niece was being life flighted to Portland due to heart failure. I made several trips helping logistics.
June 13th ~ My niece passed away...
June 18th ~ we buried her... and the days between the 13th and 18th were spent organizing her funeral. I should have been doing her WEDDING (one day) not her funeral. Flowers ordered, balloons ordered, memory box made, vinyl projects completed... and so much more. I was lost in busy-ville. BUT, projects and the funeral are over and I am feeling the full weight of my sadness now.
I need a break. No more tragedy please!
I need time to mourn the loss of family, the loss of growing our family, the loss of the life we had dreamed for our child.
Time!
But, I don't have that luxury of getting to stop and mourn.
I still have a house full of children (that I adore and WANT to serve) that need to be fed, cleaned and have laundry.
I still have a calling to stay on top of and do (multiple days a week).
I still have a husband that needs me to support his calling and tend to the house/yard chores.
I still have three ladies/families that I visit teach that need help in their own lives.
I still have extended family members that need me....
Yet, I KNOW that I need a break ~ before I BREAK!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
I don't know what to say except for I am sorry for your losses. You do need a break. I hope and pray that Heavenly Father can comfort you and take away your pain so you can continue on and be the great woman that you are. You are an amazing woman! I have looked up to you ever since I first met you when you were my 1st year girl's camp leader. I wish there was something I could do to help you out.
Wow, that was intense. You do need a vacation. Amongst all your responsibilities, maybe you could take a breather from your calling awhile, or just do the minimum or ask for help. Yourself and your family come first, and I don't think it's wrong to take a step back from everything else 'till you can breathe again. I think that's perfectly ok. I'm sorry it's been such an intense year! That's a lot to go through. I would get some priesthood blessings and remember you can rely on our Savior. I hope you find peace through all of this! It's a lot!
Post a Comment