I've been feeling in a funk again. I hate this cycle business that I'm stuck in. I have great days/weeks and feel okay about having my family here in Texas and then the FUNK hits and I want outta here.
I want to be gone when the forecast calls for tornadoes and for thunderstorms cuz the storms here aren't anything like the wee baby storms we got back in Oregon. I want to be back with my growing extended family and be an auntie that they know and grow up loving. Not some crazy lady that always sends a valentine card, birthday present and family picture at Christmas time. I want them to KNOW me. I want to be a part of their lives. I want my children to KNOW their cousins and their aunties and uncles. I want to go on family camping trips. I want to be a part of family reunions for MY side of the family. We will only be a part of the Stanley side since our travel expenses are always budgeted in.
I want to be home. I want normal temps... six to eight months of temps above 90 degrees is just too hot and too long. I want to have girl's nights out with my sisters and mom. I want my BFF girl's only weekend with Kimmy, Baby K, Steph2 and Miss K. I want to see green mountains. I want to be near the ocean. I want to be around my friends. Ladies that know me... that love me. I want my LIFE back.
But none of this is my reality anymore. I am stuck here in this tornado alley world of Texas. My husband's job is here and we can not be transferred back to Oregon ~ ever. So I just need to buck up... but being lonely sucks. So why can't I get out of this funk? Some have suggested getting my kids involved in things... we have no $ or budget for anything extra. They have said to form a book club or girl's night out group... the women of my ward are young. They look at me like I'm a grandma. My kiddos hang with their cousins... they don't have school friends or play dates and the kid's in our neighborhood are younger than my crew. I'm sitting in a metroplex with more than 8 million people and I'm sooooo flippin' lonely.
I want to be gone when the forecast calls for tornadoes and for thunderstorms cuz the storms here aren't anything like the wee baby storms we got back in Oregon. I want to be back with my growing extended family and be an auntie that they know and grow up loving. Not some crazy lady that always sends a valentine card, birthday present and family picture at Christmas time. I want them to KNOW me. I want to be a part of their lives. I want my children to KNOW their cousins and their aunties and uncles. I want to go on family camping trips. I want to be a part of family reunions for MY side of the family. We will only be a part of the Stanley side since our travel expenses are always budgeted in.
I want to be home. I want normal temps... six to eight months of temps above 90 degrees is just too hot and too long. I want to have girl's nights out with my sisters and mom. I want my BFF girl's only weekend with Kimmy, Baby K, Steph2 and Miss K. I want to see green mountains. I want to be near the ocean. I want to be around my friends. Ladies that know me... that love me. I want my LIFE back.
But none of this is my reality anymore. I am stuck here in this tornado alley world of Texas. My husband's job is here and we can not be transferred back to Oregon ~ ever. So I just need to buck up... but being lonely sucks. So why can't I get out of this funk? Some have suggested getting my kids involved in things... we have no $ or budget for anything extra. They have said to form a book club or girl's night out group... the women of my ward are young. They look at me like I'm a grandma. My kiddos hang with their cousins... they don't have school friends or play dates and the kid's in our neighborhood are younger than my crew. I'm sitting in a metroplex with more than 8 million people and I'm sooooo flippin' lonely.
Countdown: 11 super hot/humid days
1 comment:
I miss having girls night and friends, too. I can totally relate the $0 budget. I wish we could have it all!
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